It’s time to wrap up the year, and 2019 was one hell of a year. Mostly filled to the brim with bullshit, but hey, what’s the end of a decade for? Thank the gods that it is over!
Did Anything Go Right In 2019?
I got a new furnace. Otherwise, no – and the man is sticking it to us even now, just before the end of the year. The boyfriend has lost his food stamps and medical, for no known reason – and I’m down to $16 a month currently, for some unknown reason. And with no phone, can’t find out why and maybe fix it just yet. Always something this year to make life a little more challenging – but hey, definitely incentive to get the fuck off the state.
They really are more trouble then they are worth.
You end up jumping through more hoops than a normal person would expect, after laying down any sort of dignity you had left. Then you are beholden to them as they dole out some measly amount that you can just barely maybe survive on…but can change on a whim. And woe to the person that doesn’t follow the 400 million rules there are to these “benefits!” Never mind the fact that no one knows 1% of them, never mind ALL of them – and most of them you swear are made up literally on the spot.
Did I mention that you are treated like literal dirt this whole time? How dare you *gasp* need help?!
2010 – 2019
Honestly, not a good decade for me – at all! Lots of loss in the beginning – lost my mother in Oct of 2010. My daughter was diagnosed with autoimmune hepatitis in Jan 2011. Literally one thing after the other happened in this decade – it was a very turbulent decade. I became disabled in 2010, though I didn’t actually receive benefits till 2015. I will be very glad to see the backside of this decade, that is for sure.
I don’t think I met any of my goals at all in this decade, other than staying alive. Which is all I really can say I did. Which is actually quite the accomplishment, considering there were many a time where I was pretty sure life was trying to kill me.
Looking Forward To 2020
Fortunately, 2019 is almost behind us. And before us, all the glory that is 2020 and a new decade wrapped up in one. I have high hopes for this year, and this decade, that’s for sure. I’m not entirely sure it could be any worse than the one I just left. Really hoping to do some living and not just surviving, that’s for sure – I’m not getting any younger. Kiddo is going to be graduating high school soon – I’m running out of time quite literally.
In 2020 I am focusing on my most important value: Freedom. Without that one value, nothing else really matters all that much to me. And I’m finding already that freedom means much more than face value! I’m digging into some limiting beliefs, soul searching, doing lots of inner work – while also focusing on the obvious financial and other external definitions as well. This may carry me through the entire decade, we shall see.
Making more money is definitely one of my goals. But beyond that, I’m actually putting the time and effort into becoming financially stable with what I have right now. Yes, that means a budget – and so far, no one is happy with it but me. My boyfriend is the least happy. He’s already trying to change my mind and manipulate things to his liking, but so far, I’m holding strong. He’s even threatened not to do anything around the house! Which hey, is fine by me – do nothing, and I don’t have to give you an allowance at all. That’s money I can put elsewhere.
I have a lot of goals for the coming year, and with them, several new habits need to be instilled into me. A lot of people forget that habits make up goals and that to make goals easier, you need to come up with and get new habits. I’m about as prepared for 2020 as I can get, though I still have some planning to do to ensure that everything I can think of is covered. Of course, it’s a living document – I’ll be adding as time goes on and removing as things get accomplished.
What are your plans for 2020? Are you happy or sad that 2019 is leaving us?
Posts You May Have Missed In 2019